Comments on: New Video Up: Intro to Adult Storytelling Manifesto http://www.adelejournal.com/2010/07/new-video-up-intro-to-adult-storytelling-manifesto/ Writing & marketing resources for authors of romance, erotica, pulp, and other adult-oriented genres. Thu, 15 Dec 2011 01:29:10 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 By: Melody http://www.adelejournal.com/2010/07/new-video-up-intro-to-adult-storytelling-manifesto/comment-page-1/#comment-2525 Melody Wed, 28 Jul 2010 20:50:09 +0000 http://www.adelejournal.com/?p=622#comment-2525 Now that makes more sense. I didn't get the sound. Melody x Now that makes more sense. I didn’t get the sound.
Melody x

]]> By: Eva van Loon http://www.adelejournal.com/2010/07/new-video-up-intro-to-adult-storytelling-manifesto/comment-page-1/#comment-2523 Eva van Loon Wed, 28 Jul 2010 17:41:43 +0000 http://www.adelejournal.com/?p=622#comment-2523 Drop the first sentence or two of each section or paragraph. Jump right into the middle. Music too loud at the beginning. You didn't background your speech with it, though--good choice! (Older ears, especially, hate the combination.) Get rid of your apologies about yourself or your presentation. Your enunciation is great, except for a couple of spots (notably, in the apologetic bits) where a syllable gets swallowed up. Drop the first sentence or two of each section or paragraph. Jump right into the middle.

Music too loud at the beginning. You didn’t background your speech with it, though–good choice! (Older ears, especially, hate the combination.)

Get rid of your apologies about yourself or your presentation.

Your enunciation is great, except for a couple of spots (notably, in the apologetic bits) where a syllable gets swallowed up.

]]> By: Melody http://www.adelejournal.com/2010/07/new-video-up-intro-to-adult-storytelling-manifesto/comment-page-1/#comment-2520 Melody Wed, 28 Jul 2010 16:40:14 +0000 http://www.adelejournal.com/?p=622#comment-2520 Hi Adele, You asked for feedback... Some nice images but I'm pretty sure people won't stick around to see them. They'll move on. Video is a fast and hungry medium. It devours material. Your black screens slow it down too much. We've been taught to take in visual stuff fast and I think you need to respect that. Some sound too would be good. Sorry if this sounds negative. It's a fine idea. Melody xx Hi Adele,
You asked for feedback…
Some nice images but I’m pretty sure people won’t stick around to see them. They’ll move on. Video is a fast and hungry medium. It devours material. Your black screens slow it down too much. We’ve been taught to take in visual stuff fast and I think you need to respect that. Some sound too would be good. Sorry if this sounds negative. It’s a fine idea.
Melody xx

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